Bev’s Beholden, Day 24

We’re nearing the end of this month of gratitude, and I have so many things left on the list! I guess that’s a good thing. But for tonight, I have to say that I’m extremely thankful that my friends and I are not members of this younger Instagram set. Specifically, the ones who post these huge “happy birthday” posts to their “best” friends, but really, they’re just finding the best pictures they have of themselves with said “best friend” and then post some stupid Insta story with one photo per story. You know:

Happy (two girls at a bar. birthday girl is clearly hammered, but the “friend” posting the birthday wishes looks like Kendall Jenner.)

Birthday (birthday girl’s eyes are closed. “Friend” is sticking her tongue out in some sort of perfectly posed “playful” gesture.)

To the Most (group of five girls at a college football game. Everyone is looking at a different camera, except the “friend” posting the Insta story. She is staring straight into your soul and her contour/highlight is on point.)

Beautiful (“friend” has given up at this point. It’s just a picture of her own perfect face from a screen shot of a FaceTime call with the birthday girl, where the birthday girl is clearly in her pajamas and had just woken up.)

Girl (birthday girl isn’t even in this photo. “Friend” has taken a Boomerang video of herself blowing a kiss to the birthday girl. And she’s hoping every guy in SAE [is that even a frat?] sees it.)

So, yeah, I’m really thankful we aren’t those people.

-Bev

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