Smoke Saves the Day (Again)

While we’re on the subject of Smoke Goldenstein fixing shit for people, I thought this might be a good time to share another story of his heroics. This one took place last summer- you know, when we could all be together- indoors or out- with reckless abandon. This story, again, involves the pool and Timmy and Keith’s house. I was over there hanging out with Keith, Gertrude, Clark, Bessie, all their kids, as well as Agatha (one of my high school besties) and her kids who also live in Mayberry.

We adults were just hanging out with some cocktails while the kids swam, and Keith fired up the grill to throw on some stuff for dinner. We turned our backs on the grill area to sip our beers and pay attention to the… you know… kids.

A few minutes later, Agatha’s oldest son, Eli, looks up at us (sitting right in front of the grill, but with our backs to it) and says, “Hey, Keith, I think your grill’s on fire.” Keith smiles and replies, “Oh, thanks, Eli, but we just started it to throw some stuff on for supper so it might be a little smoky.” Agatha thanks Eli for being safe and we continue our adult conversation. But little Eli ain’t no punk, and he says something that prompts us to turn and look at the grill, which is… in fact… on fire.

Like, flames shooting fire.

Things are a bit hazy from here, but basically, Clark jumped into action and reached into the grill to turn it off/shut off the gas, I ran into the house and found baking soda, Keith got on the phone with Uncle Bart or Aunt Sue (who lived in the house for years prior to Timmy and Keith’s recent move), and Agatha, Gert, and Bess looked on in horror.

We managed to quell the flames, but none of us felt very safe about the potential of gas still flowing out of a pipe that is connected to the LP¹, so who did we call? Ol’ Smokey G, of course! 

Smoke threw on his “thongs”¹ and headed over to check out the situation, and if I recall correctly, we had actually taken care of all the potential hazards, and Smoke really just checked over our (OK, Clark’s) work, and headed home. But not before one of us could capture this piece of photographic evidence:

Remember, kids, only you can prevent grill fires!

-Beverly “Proud Daughter of Smokey the Bear” Goldenstein

¹I literally have no idea what this really means but I think it’s basically unlimited gas.

²These are what he refers to as his “thongs” and if you ever slip them on to take out the trash, grab a beer out of a cooler in the garage, etc., you better put them back in the exact position you found them on the rug.